With October’s arrival signaling the beginning of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, The Vine Wellness Group implores the remembrance of the victims that have lost their lives at the hands of an abusive partner. Although the promotion alone of D.V. Awareness Month cannot definitively put an end to the extensive prevalence of emotional and physical abuse throughout our society, we hope that - by offering insight to our community on the warning signs of an abusive partner – we can help empower the victims of abusive partners so that they may seek support from their trusted friends, family members, or colleagues.
The Statistics
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, “1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men experience severe intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner contact sexual violence, and/or intimate partner stalking with impacts such as injury, fearfulness, post-traumatic stress disorder, use of victim services, contraction of sexually transmitted disease, etc.” Additionally, “1 in 10 women have been raped by an intimate partner. (DATA UNAVAILABLE FOR MALE VICTIMS).”
Traits of an Emotionally Abusive Partner
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, an Emotionally and/or Physically Abusive Partner may:
Minimize and/or completely deny the seriousness of the violence they perpetuate, as well as its effect on the victim and their family.
Objectify their partner/sees them as “property” or sexual objects.
Have low self-esteem/feel powerless despite portraying themselves as successful, confident individuals.
Blame their violence on circumstances such as stress, their partner’s behavior, a “bad day,” alcohol, drugs, or other factors.
Be perceived as pleasant and charming between periods of violence and is often seen as a “nice person” to others outside the relationship.
Additional red flags may include (but are not limited to):
Extreme jealousy
Significant controlling behavior
Antiquated beliefs about the roles of women and men in relationships
Forced sex and/or disregard for their partner’s unwillingness to be intimate.
Refusing to accept blame
Public and/or private embarrassment and humiliation of their partner in front of others.
If you or someone you love thinks they may be involved in a relationship with an abusive dynamic, help is available and accessible. For anonymous, confidential help available 24/7, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY), or visit their website at www.ncadv.org .